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Chapter 8: My Very Last Breath

by The Emo Diaries

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  • More Chapters of The Emo Diaries

tasting her skin like she's a newborn. kissing her lips like she's a doll. twisting her arms just like she wants to. stealing her breath is all you know. escape. don't you try to run from me. don't you try to run away. this is how it's supposed to be. this is how i'm supposed to be. this is how i'm supposed to do you. i could even feel through. what it's like inside of you. never been this close before. baby i've seen the night in your eyes. you know i have to put out the light. you know i have to proceed this. don't fight it. escape? don't you try to hide from me. don't you try to hide away. this is how it's supposed to be. this is how i'm supposed to be. this is how i'm supposed to do you. it's my favourite. this is my favourite part
i've had enough of these unrestricted arguments. it's worth much less than silence to spend my time like this. can't you just see through this wall of noise to see that i don't want to fight. not this time. not tonight. i'll try one more time. i'm waking up again to the sound of you not here. it's becoming all too familiar. now all that's left are vacant screams at best. now it's four am with no one listening. i wish i said nothing. i'll try one more time for you with all that's left within me to believe that we can make this through because i love you
crowned with full color. bleached out white. canvas laid bare. thrown on your covers. your faith relights. credence is clear. how bravely you run as fate unties. belated commands. afraid of the legions as fears combine. disable the ends. write down change lines and outline of atrophy. cry for the pen to write on. lights out stage right. you weren't there for me. i won't be up when you're gone. the cry will shape the chill in the air. abide the change and you will be happy again. you will be happy again
my forehead against the glass. an imprint that will last. waiting for a bus. for you to get off. for life to go on. to get out of that town. out of that house. my forehead against the glass. an imprint that will last. brother call our mom. tell her of her car. tell her of my scars. and tell her what i found. coming down
didn't mean to leave you all alone. but the spring has shown. with all the leaves dead on the trees when everything should be in bloom. and now it's over. and it won't come back. unappreciated. yeah my time was wasted. you beg to come. you beg to go. but never did your actions show. and now it's over. and it won't come back. and i want to know. if there's anything i can do. 'cause i'll be here. and i'll do anything for you. i'm so sick of waiting for everyone. my ambitions fading and it's not so much fun. when the time comes along. and you're at your end. you just let yourself down. and you let down your friends. when i come home. i'll look for you. but you won't be there. when i come home. there will be nothing new. and you still won't care
i close my eyes. while i'm driving home tonight. why do i need to see. something i don't like. changing tracks. i am lost in my way back home. where am i. these streets seem so alike. could i change the world tonight. without changing my heart inside. could i change my way back home. leaving you out of my mind. i always take the wrong tracks. that lead back to where you are. you can feel dead when you're alive. one hundred miles per hour. just to get closer to you. reaching the death in every path. feeling rejected exposed and sad. i hold the wheel. that keeps me still wanting to be by your side. you can feel dead when you're alive. and it's not so fine. wish you could see me there. and i wish you could brake my car. sorry it's all a shame. but it's not my fault. if you make me drive so fast. to get anywhere. so i close my eyes. maybe i'll be back home tonight. maybe i'll make you sad or happy tonight. it depends on how i drive. back home
i have wasted. what should have been. never existed between you and i. you'd wrap your arms around my shoulders and say. now feel this feeling. inside. yesterday's memories. all released memories. these are things that should have stayed forgotten. like the time you ran away from home. to turn around and find yourself alone
i know that having children won't keep me alive. when they are in their forties i will start to die. and this windmill life is halfway round. there's one thing that i'll know. that i can't believe i ever let you go. oh regret. regret it every night. oh regret. regret it every day. tomorrow. in this apartment all the countertops are new. i leave the windows open so the air blows through. and this nighttime sound comes pouring in. there's one thing that i know. that i can't believe i ever let you go
i walk with an angel. can see an airplane. but there's no air. no there's no air. now i'm all right. i don't need to breathe. someone's taking my hand. but there's no joy. there's no joy. walk with a body. i'm screaming your name. and the sky is falling under my feet
hey sleepyhead. keep dreaming. because the days aren't getting any better. the storms at night. they keep me up. watching the lightning explode. and then disappear
i'll know you. i'll never know anyone again. ripped at the seams early on. to let go. to throw away all that i am. i'm watching you walk and i'm stunned. my legs weigh four thousand pounds. i'm awake. i saw you last night. i can tell by your vacant expression. and it hurts me to find what i've found. but i know it might be a while. until heaven and heartbeat collide. those black shoes. covered in guilt from last night. you brushed it aside on a whim. take one step forward. and four more steps back. you're gaining on losses. but never quite catching it up from behind
shutting my eyes i can see. what is right in front of me. a twisting kaleidoscope in my head. of all the things we left unsaid. if i could make the world go away. if i could make it all disappear. distant memories relapse. encased in mirrored glass. leaves are falling. time for a change. repetitions are rearranged. if i could make the world go away. if i could make it all disappear. make it all disappear. if i could make these nightmares disappear. now it's time to fade away


"I'm sure that bands are practically killing each other to get on this seminal series of compilations, and by pointing us toward another dozen good songs with the Emo Diaries, Deep Elm is helping indie kids everywhere save the money they would have spent on errant record purchases. Once you know that this is the cream of the crop, the product of Deep Elm's freaky colander which only lets crappy bands slip through the holes, reviewing Chapter 8: My Very Last Breath on its own seems silly. You buy it regardless, because you feel a responsibility to keep abreast of the current happenings in the world. Even if you lack the natural grace and good taste to distinguish the good from the bad, you can still look smart by buying this record." - Deep Fry Bonanza

"Here is the eighth chapter of The Emo Diaries and it is the most impressive one of the series. There are bands from Sweden, Canada, USA, Switzerland and even Brazil, and this is a great way to learn about bands from all over the planet. Among the twelve that I was most impressed with were A Season Drive, The Solo Project, Slow Coming Day and Down-To-Earth Approach. Still, I think that any band on this album deserves to be heard by more people, and it would be nearly impossible not to mention everyone. The Emo Diaries: My Very Last Breath is a good resource for finding new, talented bands." - Truepunk

"For the past few years the Emo Diaries collection has defined the genre better than any other, and Chapter 8: My Very Last Breath is no exception. I'm not a big fan of comps, but this is the exception. They could not have done a better job. This diverse collection of songs ranges from soft, melodic ballads to upbeat pop numbers. Every style is represented, and represented well." - Dropout Digest

"A new chapter, twelve bands and more aural satisfaction for music lovers on My Very Last Breath. The bands on this release are global, from Sweden to Chicago to Brazil, but each of them represents a part of the emo style, from the more hard-edged to the soft and sweet. The standout tracks on here are by Long Since Forgotten (power pop with a dose of 'core), Down-To-Earth Approach (emorock ala The Get Up Kids), Hateen (indie rock that packs a punch) and The Colour Blue (amazing indie rock with smooth horns and plenty of emotion). There are few compilations out there with this kind of quality and even fewer that can attest to the consistency heard on The Emo Diaries, chapter after chapter." - Impact Press



released July 23, 2002


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With nearly 280 releases in its catalog, fiercely independent Deep Elm Records continues to build a better label - one that operates for glory, not gold. Deep Elm is about bands and fans coming together as one and experiencing music's awesome ability to inspire, comfort and console. We're not just making music together, we're making history. Dream / Create / Record / Release - Now for 27 Years. ... more

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